Sour grapes?

Here’s today’s dilemma: Last week I finally found out that I lost the screenwriting contest I was a finalist in. Oh well.

But here’s the thing that’s been bugging me. My experience with this contest was less than stellar (they announced the winner more than two months late without any communication, etc). If I’d read a review of this contest that had said that, I would have thought twice about entering and causing myself so much aggravation.

Since I lost though, people might think my complaints are just sour grapes.

 What would you do?

Woodpecker

For the past three days I’ve watched a woodpecker at work.

 This is not just any ordinary woodpecker. This is an industrious woodpecker. A persistent woodpecker.

It’s also the world’s dumbest woodpecker.

For three days, at pretty much the same time every morning, he shows up and starts hammering away. 

On a metal fence.

New leaves?

Last week, in honor of the first day of Spring, I tried to turn over a new leaf. I tried to be less cynical and sarcastic.

You’d think that my new, cheerier, less-Grinchy outlook would have been well-received by those who know me, right?

Nope.

My flowers-and-sunshine attitude scared some, and dismayed most.

So much for that idea….

Massaging the Muse

It’s been a rough couple of weeks for me on the personal front and my writing output suffered greatly, so yesterday I decided to massage my muse.

To set the mood I listened to bad 80s music.  (Pity my neighbors who had to listen to Rock Me Amadeus on an endless loop for over an hour. Why my muse needed to listen to Falco, I’ll never understand.)

 I read an old favorite book, Horse of Two Colors (Not a classic, not a best seller, not even an adult book, but the book I read when I was seven that made me want to tell stories. A dear friend bought me a copy of this book a couple of years ago and now I read it whenever I’m frustrated.)

 I indulged in some awesome  white grapefruit and vanilla tea. YUM! 

I slathered on a boatload of Vanilla Bean Noel body lotion (Bath & Bodyworks only sells it at Xmas time, so I usually dole it out to myself in little decadent bits.)

I told the barrista at Starbucks “yes” when she asked if I wanted the cinnamon dolce sprinkles on my grande non-fat steamer with sugar free cinnamon dolce syrup no whip.

 Sated and satisfied my muse got back to work and I had the most productive day I’d had in weeks.

How do YOU massage YOUR muse?

Yay! A new way!

SOOOOOO excited!

 I figured out a new way to kill someone last night. (Okay, I’m sure it’s not “new” but it’s new to me since I’ve never read/seen it.)

 I’d tell you what it is, but then I’d have to kill ya!

A new insurance scam?

At some point in the past few days I heard or saw or read a story about two women in their 70s who befriended two homeless men, took out life insurance policies on the men, and ran them both over in an attempt to make their deaths look like hit-and-runs.

Not only the young come up with stupid plans.

Do you have a “core” story?

I’ve read a number of articles that say that writers tell, and retell, and retell again, one core story. Their characters and locations and plots may all change, but they tell the same story (and are often unaware they’re doing so).

 I know that I’m guilty of it, so much so that part of it has become a running joke with a writing friend. I’ll say in my most sarcastic tone, ”Hey, you’ll never guess what’s going to happen to the so-and-so character!” and she’ll say, “Oh, I don’t know, does she ____?”

 Another part of my personal core family is that at least one of my characters always has a “chosen” family.  This is not the biological family they were born into, but the family they’ve constructed through various friendships.

 These are parts of my core story. Do you have one?

Speed is relative

 I’ve been waiting to hear about a number of full book submissions since the first week of December, with any luck, I hope to get word by the first week of April. I’ve been waiting to hear from an agent who requested the full after reading the partial a few weeks ago and promised to read it “as soon as possible”.  I’m still waiting.

Worse than that is this damn screenplay contest I’m a finalist in.  I entered it in July. The winners were scheduled to be announced in the beginning of January.  More than a week ago they said on their website that the winner would be announced “very soon”.  The prize was supposed to be given next week. I can’t send out queries touting my finalist status in the contest as a reason to read my script because there’s that tiny chance I could actually win this thing and then my query letters would have to be sent out all over again.

“As soon as possible” and “very soon” mean different things to different people.

How movies show why writers need editors

I have a confession to make. I don’t go to the movies (which I know is odd since I write screenplays) so I’m always “behind” on what everyone else has seen. Netflix is my friend.

The last three movies (because I refuse to count the last Pirates movie as anything other than commercial sequelism with no point besides making money, it certainly didn’t entertain) I saw were:

 THE PRESTIGE, GONE BABY GONE,  and IN THE VALLEY OF ELAH

 All of these movies were good, but I’m of the opinion they could have been great, if only the writer had gotten the hell out of the way.

The Prestige  written and directed by Christopher Nolan was interesting — not the best movie (I didn’t find a single character to be likable) but a beautifully constructed puzzle (which is what he is best at — remember Memento?)

Gone Baby Gone convinced me that Ben Affleck really did write at least part of Good Will Hunting — the dialogue had such a distinctive cadence that I double-checked the credits to make sure I wasn’t going crazy and that he did co-write this film.  Unfortunately, the pacing of this movie helps to cement my theory that writers should not be allowed to direct their own scripts.  BUT the ending left DH and I arguing (which is always a good thing — art that can entertain and make us think deserves kudos) I’ve now added Dennis Lehane’s book to my To Be Read list.

 In The Valley of Elah –  Paul Haggis (Crash, Million Dollar Baby, Walker, Texas Ranger — had to toss that one in there) is one of the best writers out there. This script is full of interesting ideas and raises interesting issues, but the execution was flawed.

 I’m in awe of all of these writers. The scripts are brilliant, but the films could have used the perspective of someone else in order to spot their weak spots. That’s where a director, or in the case of a novelist, an editor can help to make the final product stronger.

It’s one of THOSE weeks

Nothing is going well.

 I’m stuck on both of my WIPs.

 I’ve heard nothing about my book out on submission.

I’ve heard nothing about my screenplay.

I was sick over my birthday weekend.

At least three good friends are going through very bad times.

I’m still sick.

Could I possibly whine about anything else?   This is why I haven’t blogged lately.